


Braided Bakas Unite!

by Lys ap Adin (lysapadin)



Category: Fushigi Yuugi, Gundam Wing
Genre: AU, Crack, Crossover, Multi, Unfinished and Discontinued, possible fangirl japanese
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2000-04-23
Updated: 2000-08-28
Packaged: 2017-10-03 20:50:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lysapadin/pseuds/Lys%20ap%20Adin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Duo gets sent to the Book of the Four Gods, too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a repost of a very old, never-to-be-finished side story to my story [Okane and Omae o Korosu](http://archiveofourown.org/works/22056). It picks up at the start of [Chapter 13](http://archiveofourown.org/works/22056/chapters/28648) and diverges there.
> 
> It will not be finished.

Suzaku kept his exhilaration hidden carefully, pondering his cards. Just one more hand, and he'd be able to declare--

"Gin." Emily laid her cards down for all to see.

Seiryuu burst into laughter at the sight of the complete chagrin on the face of his red-haired brother. Byakko shook his head. "Really, Suzaku, you *know* better by now."

"Yeah," Genbu added. "After all, look at the mess you got into over the *last* card game with her."

"That was high stakes poker," the god protested. "How was *I* supposed to know that she's good at gin rummy, too?!"

Seiryuu grinned at Emily. "Nice job, Em-chan. Owing you is worth the seeing the look on his face. So, what's the price this time?"

She looked thoughtful. "Well... there's something a few friends of mine have been wanting to see, actually..."

"Here it comes..." Suzaku muttered.

"Don't be such a sore loser," Byakko chided. "It's not that big a deal--we're gods, after all."

Genbu grinned. "Besides, how often to we get to just have fun with things? You take this job far too seriously."

"Hai, hai... At least I'm not the *only* one who owes her a favor this time," Suzaku sighed. "So, Emily, what'll it be this time?"

Emily smiled. "I'm so *glad* you asked..."

   


* * *

  
 

==Don't leave me!== Duo, eyes firmly shut and leaking tears as he clutched the boy in his arms, neither saw nor felt the soothing red glow that wrapped around him and Tamahome.

The next thing he knew, he was face down in a drift of snow, and there was an awful lot of fuss going on about fifteen feet away. Groggily, he pushed himself into a sitting position, automatically reachign for his gun. Tamahome, he noticed absently, was lying curled on his side a few feet away.

Duo paused. How in the hell had they gone from the kitchen--to a snow-covered mountain?! And why was there a group of young men--and one girl--huddled around a bleeding body? He blinked. The tallest member of the group stretched out a hand over the supine figure, as in a benediction. A soothing green glow spread from the spread fingers, washing over the bloody young man and--"Sugoi," Duo breathed, as the wounds--disappeared. *I don't think we're in Kansas anymore...*

The healed young man was sitting up dazedly, looking around with a confused expression. "N-nani?" His eyes fell on the girl. "Miaka!"

She hesitated. "Tamahome?"

He nodded. "Miaka..."

"Tamahome!" She glomped him.

Duo blinked. *What the--* He turned to look at the spandex-clad form not too far from where he was sitting. Bewildered cobalt eyes stared back at him. "Heero?" he mouthed, incredulously.

A terse nod. Yes.

Duo scrambled to his feet, taking a few steps toward Heero, before stopping himself, mindful of the other concerns at hand.

"Just who the fuck are you?" demanded a red-haired man, pointing (of all things) a large metal fan at them.

Immediately turning, Duo trained his gun on the threat. He grinned. "You can call me Duo."

The guy embracing the girl and incessantly mumbling her name looked up, interrupting his litany. "Oi, what are *you* doing here?!"

"Tamahome, is that you?" Duo called.

"Hai. It's all right, Tasuki, he's a friend... sort of," The teal-haired young man sighed.

"Will someone *please* tell me what the hell is happening?!" Duo asked plaintively.

"Put the gun down, baka," a familiar nasal voice intoned behind him.

The purple-haired man stood. "Ne, Hee-chan, is that you?"

"Hai, Nuriko."

Duo lowered the gun slowly and glanced back at Heero. *Hee-chan?* Heero had stood, and his face had settled into its normal indifferent glare. "I'm confused," the braided pilot sighed, stowing his weapon away. "Don't even say it, Heero." He flashed his customary grin at the strangers. "I'm Duo Maxwell."

A round of introductions followed, and eventually Duo raised the question again. "Can *anyone* tell me what's going on here? Please?"

"Da... we don't know na no da..." Chichiri shrugged.

"Heero and I were fighting Ashitare, and Ashitare nearly killed him. When Mitsukake healed Heero just now... it was Tama-chan," Nuriko recounted to Duo.

Tamahome glared at Heero. "Teme, what were you thinking, doing that to my body?"

Heero glared back. "I was fulfilling the mission to protect the miko."

Tasuki looked at Duo. "Is he *always* like that?"

"You have no idea," Duo groaned. "Okay, look, I'm guessing another wire got crossed somewhere, and both Heero and I ended up here. How do we get home?" He glanced at Nuriko and Heero, who were standing uncomfortably (to Duo's mind, anyway) close. *If... we both _want_ to go home...*

Chiriko piped up. "Probably the only way to do that is to wish for you to go back to your world."

"Well, I wish to go back right now," Duo told him, misunderstanding.

"Not like that, baka. The miko has to summon Suzaku and make a wish for him to send us back," Heero told him.

"Oh. Great.... just great..." Duo shook his head. "And how does the miko do that?"

"We have to retrieve the Shinzaho," Miaka told him, smiling and snuggling up to Tamahome even more.

Duo bit back a frustrated groan. "And where is the Shinzaho?" he asked politely.

"Hee-chan and I think it's over there, in a cave behind that rock," Nuriko announced.

Duo suppressed a shudder, and grinned widely. "Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go get that Shinza-whatsamawhosit."


	2. Chapter 2

Tasuki appeared to be mulling something over as they approached the cave. "Oi, I've got a question," he announced, looking at Duo and Heero. "You two an item or what?"

"Nani?" Duo exclaimed, shocked by the question.

Tasuki shrugged. "I was just wondering--Chichiri, stop elbowing my ribs, damn it!--because you have that braid and all, and Heero was yelling for you when he was still in Tamahome's body and for crying out loud, Chichiri, if you don't stop it..." He swatted at Chichiri. "Shit, just ask a simple question and you get all sorts of abuse around here."

Duo sighed mournfully, casting his gaze to the heavens. "Why does everyone just *assume* that the guy with the braid is gay, huh?"

"Well, Nuriko had a braid until this morning, and he's gay too," Tasuki pointed out. "SHIT! Chichiri, that hurt, damn it!" He rubbed his shin ruefully.

Duo's eyes widened. He looked at Nuriko, stricken. "You lost your braid?" He glomped the purple-haired seishi. "Oi, I'm so sorry--You have my sympathy..."

Nuriko grinned at him. "It's okay... I did it on purpose... sort of..." He rubbed the back of his much-lighter head sadly. "Though I kind of wish I hadn't..."

Duo nodded vigorously, clutching at his own braid protectively. "I think I'd just have to die or something..."

"Hn. Baka."

Duo just grinned at Heero. "You always say that."

Tasuki sighed loudly, exasperated. "So, are you or aren't you?" He dodged away from Chichiri, bumping right into Mitsukake, who, after exchanging a glance with the monk, gravely smacked the bandit. "ITAI!"

Duo hemmed and hawed for a moment, flushing and glancing sideways at Heero, wondering what to say.

Heero glared at the group, which was looking at him expectantly. He seized Duo, pulling him close and wrapping the other boy's braid around his fist. "We are," he said simply. His fingers tightened on Duo's shoulder. "Duo's mine."

Duo gasped very softly, barely breathing. "...Heero?"

Heero rested his face against the side of Duo's neck, whispering just loudly enough for Duo to hear. "Dai suki, Duo."

Tasuki smirked triumphantly, even though he had to brush away a maudlin tear. "You see? That wasn't so hard, now was it?" He backed away from the expressions on his companions' faces. "What?"

Nuriko sighed. "Someday, Tasuki-chan, you and I are going to sit down and have a long talk about this thing called tact."

Tasuki looked puzzled. "Is that anything like tacky?"**

There was a collective sweatdrop.

   


* * *

  
 

"I still can't believe you wasted ammunition on two ghosts," Heero grumbled as they walked out of the cave, Genbu no Shinzaho in tow.

"Oi! I didn't know they were ghosts!" Duo complained. "I can't believe you accused me of *missing* two glowing targets in a dark cave. You know I'm a better shot than that, Heero." He tapped his lover's shoulder meaningfully.

"You two are adorable when you argue," Nuriko commented drily. "Aren't they, Miaka?"

The miko nodded. "Just like a pair of newlyweds or something...."

For some reason, that made Duo remember something rather important. "Oh, shit... the other guys," he moaned, slapping his forehead.

"Nani?" Heero asked, suddenly all business.

"They went out on a mission... if we don't get back before they do, then what are they going to say? Hell, what if a mission comes in for me while I'm here?" Duo ground his teeth.

Heero frowned. "Aa..."

Chichiri shrugged. "All the more reason for us to reach Sailo swiftly no da."


	3. Chapter 3

"Inventory time."

"Huh?" The group sitting around the table, forming plans for the journey to Sailo, had almost forgotten Heero's presence in their midst. (Duo, on the other hand, had yet to go five minutes without asking a question, offering an opinion, or cracking a joke.)

"What the hell are you talking about?" Tasuki asked, looking at Heero.

Heero pointed at Duo. "Empty those pockets, I want to know what we have to work with."

Duo pouted. "Saa, Heero, I bet you'd ask a lady what she carries in her purse, too, ne?" He started digging around in the first pocket. "Let's see... three hair ties... one gun, plus a full clip... a pack of bubble gum... hey, *there's* my watch! I wondered where I'd left it... one swiss army knife... Hey, Heero, wanna screw?" Duo smirked and tossed the spare screw at his partner.

"Baka." Heero caught the screw and regarded the small pile of stuff on the table. "Do the other pocket, too."

Miaka stared. "You mean all that stuff fits in one pocket?"

"Sure! Why else would I wear these things, eh? Surely you didn't think my hips were really this wide?" Duo switched pockets and began a new litany. "Knife... two more hair ties... lube---"

Heero lifted an eloquent eyebrow as Miaka blushed.

"A guy never knows when he's gonna get lucky," Duo leered at Heero. "A band-aid... piece of peppermint candy... so *that's* where my math homework went! And here I blamed it on the dog... a pencil stub... and pocket lint. Happy now, Heero?"

Apparently satisfied, Heero shrugged. "You can put it away."

Duo proceeded to make the assortment of his belongings disappear. "Oi, gonna give me that screw or what?"

Heero smirked. "Later."

The Suzaku seishi looked at each other, reactions ranging from amused to embarrassed. "You certainly have quite an influence on Heero no da," Chichiri finally observed.

Duo grinned. "Call it the Maxwell charm."

"I was beginning to wonder if he was even human," Tasuki put in.

Heero glared at them. "Hn."

Nuriko laughed. "You know you like it, Hee-chan."

Duo looked at Heero. "That reminds me... Hee--"

"Duo, I *will* kill you."

Duo pouted some more. "You didn't even know what I was going to say."

"Yes I did."

"You never let me have any fun."

Tamahome sighed. "And I thought Duo was bad by himself."

Heero paused slightly, seeing a dark flicker in Duo's eyes and making a note of it. "His performances always improve with an audience."

Duo's eyes went wide, and he promptly clamped both hands across his mouth to prevent his guffaws from escaping.

Nuriko digested this, and grinned. "Really? Care to prove that, Hee-chan?"

"I believe this conversation is no longer appropriate," Mitsukake said gravely. "Chiriko..."

The youngest seishi sighed quietly. "I know... oyasumi nasai." He and the healer left.

"I think I'll go to bed too," Miaka said hastily, rising. Tamahome wordlessly followed her.

"Nuriko, you're driving them off with your hentai ways," Tasuki chuckled.

Duo, finally reaching a point where he was only chuckling, managed to comment. "But it was *Heero* who said it!"

"Baka. That's not what I meant." Heero reflected for a moment. "Although I suppose it would be true in that sense too."

"Oyasumi no da!" Chichiri fled with as much dignity as he could.

"Shit, he's cracking jokes," Tasuki said, amazed. "He really *is* human."

Duo put a fingers to his lips. "Shhhh, it's a secret."

"Enough," Heero said firmly. "For maximum efficiency, we need sleep."

Nuriko groaned. "Still the mission, Hee-chan?"

"Always the mission," Duo snorted, with a faint seriousness to his tone.

Heero smiled faintly. "Not always." He tossed the screw at Duo.

Duo's eyes lit up. "Ninmu ryoukai!"

As they hurried away, Nuriko looked over to Tasuki. "Oi, Tasuki, mind if I bunk with you tonight?" he asked wryly.

"Shit, you don't actually think they're gonna..." Tasuki paused. "Ah, hell, at least you don't snore... me and Chichiri can make room I guess."

   


* * *

  
 

"Sugoi," Duo breathed, snuggling a little closer to Heero.

Ever pragmatic, Heero snorted. "It wasn't *that* good."

Duo laughed. "Not that. You've never been this willing to cuddle with me... before."

"Hn." Heero pulled Duo a little closer. "You and Tamahome don't get along."

"Uh... no. Definitely not. I had assumed he was you, and he really didn't appreciate that. He's better now, though. Guess he prefers being in his own body." Having the *real* Heero back considerably mellowed Duo's feelings toward Tamahome. "It's not important. So, what's with this Hee-chan business?"

"..."

Duo lifted his head to look at Heero directly. "He likes you, doesn't he?"

"Aa."

"Do you like him?"

Heero stroked Duo's hair, thinking. "He made me think of you. A lot. But he wasn't you."

Duo smiled. "Good answer, Heero."

   


* * *

  
 

*Now I know why he kept looking at me funny,* Nuriko thought absently, waiting for sleep to come. * A braid, purplish eyes... I must've made him think of Duo every time he looked at me.* He sighed, quietly. *They look good together...*

From across the room, Tasuki listened to Nuriko's sigh, feeling bad for his friend. Maybe he *was* only a bandit from Reikaku, but he wasn't *completely* clueless when it came to how other people were feeling. And he could tell that Nuriko had it bad for Heero.

Tasuki frowned, pondering. There had to be *something* he could do for Nuriko...

Then he grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Postscript, November 2009: And that's all I ever wrote of that.
> 
> In retrospect, I probably should have had a firmer idea of what I wanted to have Duo-in-the-book accomplish than I did. I seem to recall a vague impulse towards Tasuki orchestrating a Duo-Heero-Nuriko threesome of some sort, but that's about all I remember.


End file.
